Tuesday, February 09, 2016

CODE YELLOW... THE SAGA CONTINUES!

When we last left you, our cocky companion, Bok, was teetering on the edge of his destiny, unsure of whether to go toward the light or return to Earth with his BFF, Lola.  It was touch & go for awhile in the Hooligan household, and we weren't about to count our chickens before they hatched, so to speak. But our Feta just HAD to live to cluck another day.  SURELY he could pull through!  He's a tough old bird, right?!?!


We were bound & determined to stick our necks out any way possible to save that little guy. Granted, Bok was no spring chicken, but his life still had worth and value, and we would pull out all the stops to help our Feta rule this roost yet again.

We suctioned...
...and we suctioned some more.

[PS -- Guess what?  Chicken butt.]
7?  O.M.G.  His temp is down to SEVEN DEGREES?!?!?  We're losing him!!!
DAMN THAT WASHING MACHINE OF DOOM!
Let's see if a rectal temperature reading is more accurate... Ummmm, no.
Come on, ya dumb cluck!!! Put up a freakin' squawk!

Ohhhhh nooooooooo!!!!!!  Wattle we do?!?!?  (See what I did there?!)

Be brave, Bok.  Come back to your flock.
They say Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy can sometimes be effective with near-drownings, so we had to give it a go.
If it was good enough for Michael Jackson, it is good enough for our Feta.

On a wing & a prayer, Scott tried tiny chest/breast compressions on our
fowl friend with hopes that Feta would once again strut his stuff.

When all else failed, Scott tried mouth-to-beak resuscitation...
... and he was sure to listen for any signs of clucking and/or breathing.
There was only one thing left to try... fried chicken.  I mean, shocking our rubbery rooster back to life.
CLEAR!!!

And now it was simply a waiting game.  Would Feta "wake up with the chickens" ever again?  Would he ruffle any more feathers?  Would he ever cross the road?  Would he run around like a chicken with his head cut off?  Would the sky continue falling?  Would he ever choke his own chicken (wait, wrong chicken quote... oopsie!)?  Would he ever again do the "funky chicken" in all his glory?!?!? And furthermore, which DID come first -- Bok or the egg?! So many questions, so few answers. Only time would tell.


I would SO cue the 2004 Grammy Award-winning anthem titled “Shake Ya Tailfeather” by Nelly, P. Diddy (or is it Puff Daddy? Puffy? Diddy? Sean? Sean John? Cluck it, I give up.) & Murphy Lee if I could right now because that Bok OG (Original Gallus, as in Gallus Domesticus, the scientific name of the common chicken. Not to be confused with Common, the rapper.) cock-a-doodle-doo’ed himself right back to life, by gum! 
Feta & his colorful counterpart attempt to coexist with Mrs. Pocket in complete harmony.
Wait, who is this guy?!?!  Imma wring his neck!
Mmmmm...tastes like chicken.
Lola says, "The yolks on you!" by subtly attempting to "Ozzy Osbourne" poor stand-in Feta.
She clearly isn't his "Mother Hen."
(Note:  No chickens or dwarves were harmed during the filming of this dorky melodrama.)
Pocket has never been more cocksure of anything in all her life.  That fake Feta got what he deserved!!! They say poultry maintain a definite pecking order, and that is CLEARLY evident here.  
Nothin' but LOVE
Bok = Cock of the Walk
#rockoutwithyourbokout
xo

16 comments:

Gloria said...

Nice to see you all again. Have a good rest of your week. Here comes affection and a prayer from Texas. - Gloria

S. Vaughn - Missouri said...

You have an absolutely beautiful family and you are doing a phenomenal job of being the best mom, wife and honest human being. Your story touched my soul today! Thank you!

Stephanie Harper said...

That does it! Certifiably nuts!!

Jen Meister said...

Hilarious!!! Love it!

NeeNee said...

Best laugh of the day! Had me sitting on the edge of my couch here, hopeing and almost praying for Bok's best possible outcome! Yay! You guy's rock!Thanks for keeping us in the loop!

Cindi Maynard said...

O.M.G!! You cluck me up, girl!!! I'm literally cackling right now! Will be sharing both parts of "The Saga" with my BOF'S (birds of a feather) and peeps!!! think maybe this avian humor is contagious??

Rachel said...

"Claire's family has a strange and playful sense of humor" -- Redbook

LOL. You guys are goofballs.

MamaV said...

The first pic with Scott and Lola... They are making exactly the same face! Lol!

shelbyjolicoeur said...

I am new to this blog, and I am SO GLAD I subscribed. You started my day off with a lot of laughs and your family is absolutely beautiful! OMG you are so funny :D

Smcilvaineshc said...

Just discovered your blog and interviews and so happy I did. This made me laugh, made my morning! Love what you write and your attitude, so fun! Keep it up, you guys are awesome.

One Lucky Duck said...

Y'all quack me up!

Deb Garafano said...

Blahaha!!!or should I say..bokhahah

Saylor Antle said...

I am giggling like crazy. This was the first one I've read after finding this blog and I was laughing like crazy. I already love you guys! Hope everyone is well!

Sheryl V said...

Y'all are too much

Cecile Dunbar said...

Thank you for your loving heart and crazy sense of humor.

Brandi Kaufmann said...

So funny!! Love your humor. Sweet family

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